Recipe for a Delicious English Dinner Party

(Serves eight distinguished guests)
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Start with a few warm and gracious welcoming salutations:

• "So nice you could make it!"
• "Welcome to our humble home."
• "Please make yourselves comfy in the sitting room."

Add a dash or two of heart-warming comments:

• "My goodness Madeline, you look divine tonight!"
• "My dear, how is your mother doing these days?"
• "Sir George, what a stunning dinner jacket you are sporting!"

Next stir in a sprinkling of creative dinner conversation:

• "Please everyone, drinks will be served in the conservatory, so kindly make yourself at home whilst Ingrid brings them in."
• "I do so hope you all like wild pheasant with fresh herbs and all the fixings."
• "Is there anything special I can get for you before we sit at table?"
• "I am happy to inform you that tonight's dinner will be featured in next months edition of 'Fine Food, Fine Friends' magazine!"

Mix in a generous helping of complimentary remarks:

• "If I may be so bold Alicia, who does your hair these days?" "You look like a fashion icon!"
• "Dearest Barbara, how is your brilliant son making out in his first semester at Harvard?"
• "Good gracious Sir Henry, you look every inch the distinguished English Gentleman in your top and tails!"
• "Why I never knew you had such a tiny waist Miss Agatha." "You really should consider doing a tad bit of modeling for Harrods."

And finally, shake a peppering of scintillating clever conversation over the entire meal:

• "Ok everyone, lets proceed into the main dining room and loosen our waistbands in delicious anticipation!"
• "And now for the pièce de résistance!"
• "I say, Cook has prepared one of the yummiest Pumpkin Puree's in the history of culinary feasts." "I must remember to increase her Christmas bonus this year."
• "Oh before it slips my mind, be sure to leave room in your well-stuffed tummy's for the scrumptious dessert to follow."
• "We'll all take coffee in library afterwards."

Finish up the entire evening with a soothing mix of music and calming remarks:

• "We are so glad you could all make it tonight."
• "Isn't this newcomer Paul Potts simply the talk of the music community?" "We hope to book him for the entertainment at our Christmas bash next year."
• "I hope your are all full and satisfied by the fine food and company this evening."
• "Everyone is invited to come to our annual dress-up gala next month at the Country Club."
• "Would anyone like another spiced brandy before I call their drivers?"
• "Au Revoir everyone." "It's been a most marvellous evening!"

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